Enter PEANUT M&M’s to find ALMOND M&M’s and ME holding hands across a table, staring intimately into each others eyes over espressos.

PEANUT M&M’s: What is this?

ME and ALMOND M&M’s turn.

ME: (startled) Oh…ummm…wow…. I uh…Peanut M&M’s this is…

ALMOND M&M’s: (she stands and reaches for a handshake) Hi, I’m Almond M&M’s.

PEANUT M&M’s stares, crosses her arms across her chest, doesn’t shake hands, and looks at ME.

PEANUT M&M’s: So when were you planning on telling me about her.

ME: (obviously flustered) I…look…I’m sorry…things just kind of happened.  I was going to….

PEANUT M&M’s: Forget it. (she starts to tear up) Just forget it.

PEANUT M&M’s turns and heads for the door.  ALMOND M&M’s starts after her to apologize. ME grabs her arm.

ME: No…just…let her go.


PEANUT M&M’s is sitting at a bus stop in the rain.  Yellow candy shell coloring is running off into the gutter.  We follow it down the street and into a storm grate.

Almond M&M's

Looking back, it was inevitable really.  I remember eating candy-shelled, chocolate-covered almonds when I was a kid, around Easter time.  I thought they were M&M’s.  Turns out they weren’t.  They were those weird pastel impostors that were pretty good but didn’t quite taste like M&M’s.

Almond M&M's

Apparently, Almond M&M’s were an on again off again seasonal product until they were called up to the majors and put into regular rotation in 1992.  I had no idea! How did I not get my hands on them until now?! So much wasted time!

Almond M&M's

M&M’s does them right.  The ratio of chocolate to shell to almond is perfect.  They are delicious.  But with great taste comes great responsibility (or something).  Only about a dozen or so come in a regular size pack because they are so much larger than Peanut M&M’s (some of them are downright enormous).  That’s frustrating as I only bought one pack.  Don’t make the same mistake I did, kids. Two packs are the way to go.

I’m sorry Peanut. Sometimes these things just don’t work out. We had some good times though didn’t we?

Almond M&M's