Many moons ago, a care package was sent to me by faithful Food Junk reader and notoriously deadly Swiss vixen, Sandra. It contained many delicious Swiss treats, some of which didn’t fare so well on their transatlantic journey. Some died of scurvy, some were eaten alive by rats, and some were innocent bystanders in a poorly planned mutiny. The noble survivors who did complete their quest soon fell victim to my fiancé’s nearly superhuman appetite before I could review them. I’m sure they fought valiantly.
Last week, I found one of the last holdouts hiding in a cupboard above the sink, behind some never used cookbooks. I’m not sure but I think the chocolate bar was planning a tunneling escape through the floor to the downstairs apartment. I found a very tiny poster of Rita Hayworth.
Had he made it through the floor, I’m pretty sure he would have made it outside to sweet freedom, as my downstairs neighbor seems to only eat a boiled concoction that smells like diapers, lawn trimmings, and tears.
That lonely survivor was this Chocolat Frey’s Extra Fine Milk Chocolate bar. I must admit I was unfamiliar with Frey. I don’t get out much (Netflix Watch Instantly has Airwolf AND MacGyver). Chocolat Frey is a chocolate and chewing gum company founded in Switzerland way back in 1887. The company’s logo, a unicorn head, is a leftover from the days when the company made their chocolate with actual pieces of unicorn. A practice banned by the League of Nations’ in the historic passage of the Alicorn Mandate of 1946, which called for a moratorium on the manufacturing and sale of confectionary treats containing any and all parts of mythological creatures. My grandmother says that the Minotaur M&M’s were to die for.
This chocolate bar is not one of those crazy varieties made from beans that only grow in the shade of ancient Mayan monoliths whose transplanted Brooklynite farmers sing “The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald” to the cacao trees every morning. Not that there’s anything wrong with those. But sometimes in that window between gorging myself on a TGI Friday’s Fajita Skillet and the post-TGI Friday’s Fajita Skillet nap of shame, I just want a delicious bite of chocolatey goodness that will help sweep me away to my mid-evening sleep terrors.
Chocolat Frey’s Extra Fine Milk Chocolate is not complicated or nuanced or layered. It’s delightful, simple, sweet, dense, and smooth milk chocolate. I have been enjoying it in carefully rationed pieces all week. It’s good stuff.
And they also have a pretty cool website. Thanks Sandra.