Last Tuesday I kicked off Food Junk’s Week (or possibly two) of Canadian Grandeur and Majesty. I was going to rapid fire blog my way through the four flavor finalists from Lays Canada’s Do Us a Flavour contest.

I wanted to churn them out really quickly. Back to back to back to back. I wanted to look back fondly on them and be proud of my burst of productivity.  If you’ve been a Food Junk reader for any time, you might remember I used to put up two posts a week!  Two a week!  Hard to believe now that my posting schedule is handled more on a Whenever basis.

So that was the plan. And we were humming along, and I was feeling good about myself. I managed to put up posts for two of the finalists on two consecutive days! Then my wife tried to kill me with poison.

Ok. So she claims that she bought a new cleaning spray for our apartment because it was on sale at the store. She claims she didn’t know that I would be highly allergic to it. She claims she had no idea I would break out in hives or that my eyes would swell shut. She claims she didn’t know I would get the cold shivers for two straight hours on Saturday night forcing me to wear socks, jeans, a t shirt, and a hoodie to bed.

But I have my doubts.

Clearly she has a motive. I mean if I were to suddenly and tragically shuffle loose the mortal coil, she would stand to inherit quite a lot. I’m talking in the range of a few dozen to several dozen dollars, not to mention a respectable collection of vintage Kool-Aid packets, a Back to the Future Trilogy Blu-Ray, and some pretty nice trading cards.  Complete sets of Saved by the Bell: The College Years, as well as 100 Years of Hershey, just to name two.

You don’t have to be Agatha Christie to put all those Indians on the Orient Express. Am I right?  I believe I am.

But I have survived through the power of science and a pretty cute nurse who gave me a steroid shot in my right butt cheek, so here we are.  Back on track.

Our third finalist in the Lay’s Canada Do Us a Flavour contest is Perogy Platter.  The flavor is meant to evoke perogies (I’m going with the weird bag spelling) layered with sour cream, green onion, cheese, and bacon.  I didn’t know perogies were so popular in Canada. I find it interesting.  I would have never picked a flavor like this for a finalist.

The nosegrope was of a bag of sour cream and onion chips with a dusting of some bacon.  Maybe some light cheddar notes.  It reminded me a bit of TGI Friday’s Cheddar and Bacon Potato Skin Chips.

The chips appear to have been birthed from the loins of a sour cream and onion chip base.  That’s the dominant flavor, and like the nosegrope, there is some smokey bacon layered in.  The bacon builds at the end of the chew experience.  There’s not much more going on than that.

These chips don’t really call to mind perogies.  I feel like there should be some kind of dough represented somewhere in the mix.  Without dough, aren’t we just recreating loaded baked potatoes?  Haven’t we already done that?  My waistline says that we have.

These chips are good, but that’s all they are.  There is nothing wrong with them, but overall, they’re pretty unremarkable and easily forgettable.  Definitely the least interesting flavor so far.

Oh yea, and I also have some Huey Lewis and the News albums.  On vinyl.  Watch your backs, snacklings.